Characters from Arts tutorials

So, my undergraduate life will conclude in a few more days. I was trying to recall the people I have met in my tutorials who have provided my friends and I with endless hours of bitching and came up with the following:

Miss Know-It-All
She doesn’t have any knowledge of the topic at hand and yet she wants to pretend that she has written a PhD thesis on it. Distinguishing characteristics comprise of speaking in fake accents, poor articulation, a persistence to be heard and an overall dizzying impact on the listeners.

Mr. What-If
Your stomach is rumbling because of him. It’s time for lunch and you are held back because Mr. What-If is engaged in an irrelevant discussion with the tutor. He will be grilling the tutor with examples and seeking replies on how to apply concepts. As we all know there can be endless scenarios and so it’s bye-bye to lunch.

Miss I-Like-This-So-I-Must-Be-An-Expert-On-This
If the discussion is about X which/whom she likes/idolizes, she will gladly retort to any criticisms with much “proficiency”. Her arguments will revolve around the critics not understanding what X is REALLY about (read: she knows everything there is to know about it). However, to support her case, she turns to using stereotypes and sweeping statements such as “Everyone knows X is cute”. In other words, her adoration of X has qualified her as an authority on all things X and be prepared for your negative assessment to be pushed aside by the expert.

Mr. Use-Cheem-Words
This is the person who loves to throw in words to make his arguments sound more profound when he actually has no idea what he is talking about. Words in his vocabulary include: deconstruction, hegemony, discourse, juxtaposition, ideological and re-contextualization.

Miss I-Agree-With-Everything-Everyone-Has-Said
A lot of times, the portrayal of such consensus can be shown non-verbally with a nod of the head or some kind of gestures. Not for Miss I-Agree-With-Everything-Everyone-Has-Said. She will have to recapitulate what everyone has said without adding any value to the discussion. Listeners will be left with a “so?” question in their minds. A very blatant attempt to get better grades for class participation.

Mr. Talk-About-Sex
You can identify him easily. He likes to link all topics back to gender/sex during class discussions. For him, the simple dichotomy of male and female apply to all instances. Usually he likes to drop phrases such as “ego masturbation”, “massages my pride”, “mental intercourse”; generally words with sexual connotations.

I like my field of study but the pretentiousness of certain individuals can be too overwhelmingly arty-farty. I think I'll miss them. Pui!