Monday, May 23, 2005

GSS Special II - Aliens by the Billions

GSS has the tendency to bring out the evil in people. We have all heard of the "kiasu Singaporean" term and there is no time better to see this uniquely Singapore phenomenon than during sales.

So today's blog will be about the ugly shoppers for GSS! Those who have read my blog from more than a year ago may recall a similar post but what the heck! I think it is quite relevant for GSS. So, here are the aliens that flock by the billions to sales!

The Hoarder
She goes through the shop like a tornado and grabs whatever catches her fancy. It doesn't matter if they not her size because she just wants to load them all into her baskets. She can make her decision on what to buy (or not at all) at the later date after she has hoard all the best gets. If she doesn't want a piece, she would just throw it anywhere so fellow shoppers really have to hunt for it.


The Flipper
She rummages through clothes at top speed and leaves a trail of destruction wherever she goes. It doesn't matter that salesgirls have a hard enough job during sales; she has to add to their woes by disrupting their neatly folded clothes just so she can look at a new piece of the item that is already on display.


The Mirror Fighter
Most of us would have had the bad experience of meeting one of these. She is the one who thinks that no one can be prettier than her or is under the illusion that she grew up eating glass. Why? Because she does not care that others are using the mirror and has no qualms about blocking them to stand in front of the mirror. Try to outdo her by taking a step forward? Useless. She will just move until the whole mirror only shows her ugly reflection and has no space for anyone else.


The Eyer
This is the person with darting eyes that eyes what everyone else has picked up. If she spots a good get someone else is holding, she will not let it out of her sight. She would trail and stalk the person until the latter is freaked out and hurries off without getting anything. The Eyer would then lay her grubby paws on the item that was meant to be someone else's.


The Slider
You know how you sometimes have to nurse your fingers while browsing through the racks? This is all thanks to The Slider who will not care about others on the opposite side who are browsing through the same rack. She will skim through the clothes at supersonic speed, leaving the opposite party with fingers that are bruised from being caught in her whirlwind sliding motions. Sometimes you are slowly looking through the clothes on a particular shelf when The Slider descends on you and takes over your rack.


New! The Tester
Do remember to check your products! I spotted two disgusting aliens today. One tried on a pair of earrings when the sales assistants were too busy to keep an eye on them (What was she? A baby that required constant monitoring?) and did not buy them! The other happily painted her nails with varnishes that were not testers! From today onwards, I am going to sterilize every pair of earrings I buy! Eeks!


***

Many shoppers morph into aliens during GSS! A super big bane of sales is to crowd with people of these sorts. Let's look at the pale males of GSS tomorrow! Ciao darlings!

  • 9 comments:

    dweam said...

    i cant wait to shop! hee.. luckily im kinda tall so can sorta avoid the mirror stealer! hee. =P

    Adrian said...

    Hehehe, girls are just bitches. >:)

    jllt said...

    dweam: I'm not very short also but I want the full reflection! Not just the head and shoulders shot. But some of these mirror aliens are just too rude to make way.

    adrian: Confirm! JT and I were so bitching about all the sales aliens yesterday, especially the very gross earring tester.

    glitter said...

    got such thing as mirror stealer one ah? never see before. is it only near fitting rooms then have?

    jllt said...

    Haha.. Then you very lucky that you have not met them. Cause they are everywhere!

    dweam said...

    haha yah yah.. true. aiya, since they mirror u, then i'll walk infront and block them! MUAHAHAHAHAH! she can jolly well go kiss the mirror =P

    jllt said...

    Can also. But some really no shame. Block and block and block. Sometimes they seemed to stalk you, standing in front of you whenever they can.

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