Saturday, January 14, 2006

Be a desirable blog reader!

Blogging is quite a phenomenon in Singapore. In 2005, many blogs have sprung up and there is even a section in The Straits Times being devoted to recommending hot blogs. Blogs must have some kind of appeal right? But have you ever wondered what kind of blog reader you are? Are people out there really annoyed at you? Fear not! I shall highlight the top 5 less desirable kinds of blog reader! Just make sure you don’t fall into any of these categories and you shall be able to enjoy reading blogs with little fear of being flamed!

5. The Lurker®



Description: Generally The Lurker® is the one whom you know is reading your blog but just never come right out to admit it. For example, you might know some technology detecting so-and-so to be your silent reader. If you are dying for some kind of support out there to show someone is reading you, you can forget about turning to The Lurker®. I think it takes pleasure in knowing that you know it is out there yet know that you can never make it comment. Hey! We all need some boosting of our egos from time to time! Comment now or be silent forever!
Annoyance Rating: *

4. The Parrot®



Description: The Parrot® loves to talk but wait a minute, something sounds familiar? Because it is! The Parrot® reiterates what the blogger has said, either in the comments or in its own blog. Shockingly, it is closely related to The Sheep® despite them being from different species. Perhaps some mystery in evolution that scientists have overlooked? Anyway, The Parrot® always makes it appears that it knows EXACTLY what the blogger is trying to say when it usually is painfully wrong.
Annoyance Rating: **

3. The Howler®



Description: Do you know that howler monkeys are some of the loudest animals in the world? The same goes for The Howler®. The Howler® aims to be the "loudest" commentator on the blog. IT LOVES TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS AND USES LOTS OF !!! Attention seeking The Howler® may also manifest itself through leaving lots of irrelevant comments. Just so you can "hear" it wail.
Annoyance Rating: ***

2. The Sheep®



Description: Try to find this one by looking at how it is always saying "Yes XXX, I agree with you." The Sheep® is not afraid to show others that it loves to agree with them and basically, has no brains and only knows how to worship its blogging idol. Just hear it bleah in agreement. Everytime.
Annoyance Rating: ****

1. The Green Eye®



Description: Simply put, The Green Eye® is jealous of the blogger. There are many ways it would try to put the blogger in bad light such as flaming just to be contrary, spreading malicious rumors or blogging about how much it hates the blogger. The Green Eye® also denies that it is jealous of the blogger and will go all out to "prove" that the blogger is not worthy of his/her fame. Sometimes when a group of The Green Eyes® join together, they form a conglomeration to go against that very blogger. But pray do not mistaken honest critics for The Green Eye®. Also, do not be The Sheep® and be unable to tell when the blogger really deserve to be flamed. Ah! It all boils down to whether you're The Sheep® or The Green Eye®. Fine line between them indeed.
Annoyance Rating: *****

So now you know the least desirable kinds of blog reader, you no longer have an excuse to feign ignorance when people call you names like The Green Eye®, The Sheep®, The Howler®, The Parrot® or The Lurker®! Be a well-liked blog reader today!


21 comments:

Woof! said...

heh.. I usually Lurk, and on rare occasions I comment..

Hejin said...

Great post. Hmm, so does which cateogory does this comment come under?

jllt said...

You two are lurkers! :D

Mad Little Me said...

I am a sheep......

Yehey...


BR/MLM

Candyfeehily said...

you shd add the type who mindlessly comment only to attract readers to his/her own blog.

bsjj said...

YOU GOT TOMORROWED!!!

KingMeng said...

candy: think that applies to all of the five.

Xia_mi_mi said...

Well..great that you could actually take the effort to come up with different names for these "other" bloggers. But how come they are all in th enegative view? Have some on the positive side the next entry, maybe? =)

TheFiz said...

I was a howler once, AND I'M NOT PROUD OF IT!

Little fish said...

part time lurker....some blog entries aren't worth commenting...

=)

great post!

*ego rub*

The Great Swifty said...

Hah, great entry! A thinly-veiled swipe at, ah, never mind.





I'm a sheep too. Oh, the humanity.

BlacksheeP said...

there must be more animals out there... please hunt for them...Good luck. cheers.

Hai~Ren said...

Funny, and I do detect some jabs at recent happenings in the local blogosphere.

I personally don't really care about lurkers, but it's the sheep who really get on my nerves.

Hey! You forgot about Vultures! They're the ones who come swarming in hordes when misfortune befalls the blogger to gloat, or wait for someone to start flaming before they all start flaming en masse.

snoopysfavoritehorse said...

omg! i'm a lurker

Adrian said...

Yes, I think vultures should be included too.

Anonymous said...

every blog gets the readers it deserves...

:-)

Zhe Bin said...

I am number 6 - The Comments Parrot, by the way. And I think this post is so cool because I love stickmans/stickmen (which one?).

jllt said...

Wow.. Thanks for the comments! It's good that some lurkers start speaking up in my blog! :D

David said...

you shd add the type who mindlessly comment only to attract readers to his/her own blog.

Yeah, the sucker(r)!!!

Passerby A said...

Actually, I don't mind the lurkers. They form most of my readership. Once in a while they do comment, and that's fun. Hate the howlers though. I just delete their comments...

Anonymous said...

just so that i don't turn into a lurker, i'll comment. visitors don't annoy me much, only spam robots. but it's pleasent to receive comments once in awhile.