Saturday, May 10, 2008

The sales pitch


Was pondering whether to join the gym. Headed to one of the most popular gyms to find out about its facilities and rates.

Prior to the tour, I was given the impression that I was obliged to step onto the weighing machine that would also analyse your fat and muscle percentages. I declined because I felt that they would then use my fat/muscle percentage to harp on the "fact" that gym is for me. Then, snide comment no. 1:

"Why? Getting cold feet?"

Why? Just because I am giving you one less tool to aid you in your sales pitch you have to make sarcastic remarks? Furthermore, an additional guy came over and kept rubbing the cold feet thing in.

Next, we went to take a look at the gym. After explaining this and that, he brought us to the machines areas. From time to time, he would step on a machine and demostrate how it's used. Then he would offer to let us try it. We declined everytime.

"Shy?", he snickered.

Why? I don't think pencil skirts and 4" heels are compatible with machines, do you?

We sat down for The Sales Pitch. After explaining the rates, which were extorbitant (I know, because one friend had joined the gym and has friends who joined at various other times), he asked me what I felt so far. I said I thought that it was better than 5 years ago, when I first visited the gym and didn't like it. Snide comment no. 2:

"Well, you were a lot younger 5 years ago."

Well, wasn't EVERYONE? So he droned on and on about the benefits of gym, finally pausing to ask me why I was interested to see it in the first place.

"I want to be healthy."

He pressed on for more reasons. I added "feeling better". Apparently, my reasons were not the right ones. Snide comment no. 3:

"You are here to lost weight and look good of course."

Excuse me, I don't think there is an "of course" about other people's reasons. Can't my main motivation be to stay healthy because I'm afraid to die young? Can't I want to build up stamina to not huff and puff after climbing a flight of stairs?

Since I knew he was a cutthroat, I naturally didn't want to commit. Snide comment no. 4:

"Why put off what you can do today?"

Hello? It's my money. For a membership that cost a 4-digit figure, I have to consider. I told him budget is always a constraint. He replied that it wasn't expensive at all. This was how he broke it down:

$1000+++ = 365 days of gym + 800 classes per year

Effectively, each class is about 20cents and each entry less than a dollar. I remarked dryly that I am not likely to go to gym daily, let alone attend all 800 classes. He looked at me and laughed indulgently like I am a stupid child and replied," Of course not! Not even I would go to the gym that often." So WHAT was he breaking down to me with the full year entrance and the sum of all classes? No logic.

When I told him that I was looking at other options, he went to add snide comment no. 5:

"There are no other options. I'm sure all the others are charging higher."

Please consider that "other options" are not limited to gyms. I can go for classes in community centre. Sport complexes offer a fairly good gym too. I followed the statement with another fact. "I would rather play sport games than go to the gym. Games like badminton or netball."

He laughed and pointed out that it's very hard to do that because of the lack of players around. I'm sure Netball Association would disagree.


***** Updated: 20 May 2008 *****
He also asked me what I usually eat in a day. I told him bread for breakfast, usually a soup dish for lunch, and home for dinner. Snide comment no. 6:

"Soup dish? Everyday??? What about dinner? At home? Do you eat skin??? No chicken skin, pork skin for you???"

I think I know my diet better than you.

2 comments:

debaron said...

what an ass! i hope you didnt end up joining that gym.
nice to see your blog updated! ;)

jllt said...

I didn't join. I think I rather join other places. Gyms scare me. (+_+")